Afterdeath

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The pain ended quickly. I rose and tried to find my body. Probably lying mangled underneath the metallic wreck. Dying in a road accident is definitely the worse way to go.
“So! Had a nice life?” asked a voice behind me.
I turned around to find a woman smiling. Since she could see me I was pretty sure she was a soul like me.
She giggled, “You are taking it pretty well. I am Cindy by the way.”
I spoke evenly,” What happens now? Hell? Heaven?”
She laughed louder.
Before I could say something I heard a commotion from far off.
Cindy shouted,” COME ON!” And she ran.
She turned and yelled,” Have you been good?”
“What?”
“Have you done any good while you lived?”
Totally confused, I spluttered,” I…I donated blood once.”
As we reached the source of noise I was dumbstruck to find hundreds of people ripping each other apart in front of a hospital.
I shouted, “WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?”
Cindy replied, “Someone is giving birth here. These souls are fighting to get inside the new born shell.”
“But the baby…”

“LISTEN TO ME…THERE IS NO BABY UNTIL A SOUL PENETRATES IT… If no soul makes it inside, the shell is pronounced dead by doctors.”
She continued, “Your fighting strength depends on your Karma. So the soul of a rapist or a paedophile etc. stands no chance. They will never get a shell and will painfully wither away.

Children are most dangerous. Pure souls. Stay away from them during fights.”
“But what about heaven… and hell?”
“THIS IS HELL! And more importantly, the life you left behind… That is heaven.”

Original Author: wolfreakm
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52 Comments on 'Afterdeath'

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  • Commented on October 22, 2015 at 5:06 pm

    OH Jesus my brain exploded

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  • Pinetree's Revenge
    Commented on October 27, 2015 at 11:36 pm

    Wow… Just wow. Not really creeped out, but then again after years of reading these, you don’t get scared easily. Very good, puts a nice spin on death 10/10 for sure.

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  • Commented on October 26, 2015 at 8:38 pm

    WTF?! That’s messed up! Way to put a twist on death…. Now I never want to DIE! Cool story though…..

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  • rindi90
    Commented on October 23, 2015 at 2:58 am

    you, Sir… have the same Idea as me.

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  • Commented on October 29, 2015 at 1:55 pm

    This concept is really good but what bugs me is that if this were true how would there be so many bad people still coming into the world? She said pedophiles and rapists have literally no chance and just fade away but then that doesn’t explain how there are so many of them that still come into the world. The concept is really good and nice and short though so 4.5/5

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  • Commented on October 29, 2015 at 4:37 pm

    this was just a excellent pasta i rate it 5/5
    and here is a spider for your excellent story
    /╲/\〳 ᴼᴼ ౪ ᴼᴼ 〵/\╱\

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  • lollyndsey
    Commented on October 29, 2015 at 2:27 am

    It’s motivation to be a good person, really.

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  • Commented on December 1, 2015 at 8:45 pm

    great. I love this concept of life and death heaven/Hell. The fact that we all take what we have for granted and that what you’ve done and will do will always come back around to help or damn you!

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  • Commented on October 22, 2015 at 10:29 pm

    this is why children scare me, even if i am one myself… they are empty shells spirits possess. i wonder who possessed me… probably someone insane, as i find myself laughing even when nothing is funny… heheh.

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  • Commented on February 19, 2016 at 4:54 pm

    This is an excellent concept, first off. Unique idea. However, it is far too short for such a great potential story. The formatting has some problems that could have easily been fixed by some extra editing time and attention. It could have used more set-up. If you were to rework this pasta, flesh it out and deepen the experience, I could even see this as a Tales From The Crypt episode.

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  • Commented on June 1, 2016 at 10:21 pm

    I feel like the message of the story is another “Live life to the fullest” kinda thing. This just has an interesting twist on it.The concept of Heaven and Hell, Heaven being the life you live now, and He’ll being the afterlife, forever trying to get a second chance, is an interesting concept. 11/10 Cupcakes. 🙂

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  • Commented on October 23, 2015 at 1:15 pm

    Oh yes, I remember reviewing this ^_^ I passed it with about a 95%. I am glad it got posted and wish you luck :3

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  • Commented on October 26, 2015 at 4:13 pm

    Good story, I like the concept, I think.if I does I’d be pretty strong as a soul.

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  • Commented on October 23, 2015 at 4:20 pm

    It was alright 3/5 would have liked it better if it was a longer story.

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  • Commented on October 23, 2015 at 4:45 pm

    Amazing pasta! Makes me wonder if stuff like that happens after people die

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  • Commented on October 25, 2015 at 5:38 pm

    Interesting theory of reincarnation! I really enjoyed it! Keep writing stories like that! 😉

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  • Commented on October 28, 2015 at 3:49 pm

    5/5

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  • Commented on October 28, 2015 at 5:01 pm

    This is amazing

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  • Commented on November 3, 2015 at 7:03 pm

    This is good but very creepy 9/10

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  • Commented on December 15, 2015 at 3:05 am

    OH FAK WHAT Is REAl AND WHAT IS NOT
    What is life wat is death

    Great job on this 10,000/5

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  • Commented on April 19, 2016 at 5:20 pm

    Interesting… What if all souls were just recycled, and eventually they remember who they originally were and the body they posses goes insane. Mind. Blown.

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  • Commented on October 22, 2015 at 10:03 pm

    That was kinda messed up

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  • Commented on November 21, 2015 at 2:21 am

    I loved it can there be a part two please c:

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  • Commented on March 4, 2016 at 11:34 am

    Completely changed my perspective on life , death, heaven and hell….
    Well done

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  • Commented on May 10, 2016 at 2:03 am

    This was a good pasta with just the right amont of creepy sauce. I just can’t tell if it gave me goosebumps or not because my room is the coldest one in the house. XD

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  • Commented on July 19, 2016 at 11:30 pm

    This is actually pretty good, but the whole “soul shell” thing messed up my mind pretty well xD but in the end, it was a great story.

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  • Commented on September 6, 2016 at 11:21 pm

    I think that this was a GREAT idea for a story, and I think this would’ve been an AWESOME story if you kind of made it more detailed and longer

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  • Commented on October 14, 2016 at 1:27 am

    Cool and freaky …. And totally out of the ordinary . So of course I loved it!!! Brilliant work and loved the style!!
    10/10

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  • Commented on October 19, 2016 at 2:45 am

    twisted. 10/10

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  • Commented on October 23, 2015 at 1:41 pm

    wow that was amazing

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  • Commented on November 6, 2015 at 8:08 pm

    Pretty good creepy-pasta. And the karma thing is pretty cool but like someone already said, it kinda ruins it cause if people who have bad karma cant get into the shell then they wither away. but then why does bad stuff still happen? obviously you most likely forget if you are re-incarnated so then you might do something good or bad and that could change within each incarnation assuming your able to get into the baby.

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  • Commented on January 27, 2016 at 8:34 pm

    thats a good one

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  • Commented on November 2, 2016 at 4:00 pm

    Very creative, I have a similar outlook on life.

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  • Commented on November 19, 2016 at 12:45 am

    Existential crisis at its finest

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  • ice
    Commented on April 25, 2017 at 2:13 pm

    eye opener pasta here

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  • Commented on April 29, 2017 at 8:15 pm

    Cool idea, would have liked it to be longer

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  • Commented on November 3, 2015 at 4:22 am

    Very cool concept, and decent execution. A few minor formatting issues, but the writing itself was pretty good. Keep up the good work.

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  • Commented on January 25, 2016 at 4:44 am

    Whoa. Of all the afterlife’s I’ve heard of, this is one of the wildest. I think it comes second only to the theory of one person living every single life in random tandem, one after another.

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  • Commented on October 28, 2016 at 6:50 pm

    well it`s better than just disappearing I suppose

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  • Commented on January 2, 2017 at 12:08 pm

    Wow!! That really fucked my mind!!

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  • Commented on May 15, 2017 at 5:21 pm

    It was kinda short, but its really good so i guess thats okay.

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  • Commented on October 23, 2015 at 8:45 am

    Liked it.

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  • Commented on March 19, 2016 at 3:03 pm

    Short but good.Not very creepy but interesting

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  • Commented on December 20, 2016 at 6:50 pm

    this is a good one i was bamboossled

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  • Commented on April 1, 2017 at 4:56 am

    Well crap. First of all, I feel bad for the children who are dead. I’m also kinda afraid that if this is what the afterlife is like, I’m pretty much screwed. I’m not a rapist or pedo but I’m kind of bad and haven’t really done anything good yet.

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  • Commented on October 28, 2015 at 5:19 pm

    mr skeletal is good

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  • Commented on October 28, 2015 at 8:18 pm

    very nice and plez check on my story to im new guys

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  • Milk Mania
    Commented on December 15, 2015 at 1:29 am

    I never thought about it like that but actually it makes since

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  • Commented on March 23, 2016 at 3:36 pm

    NOPE !

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  • Commented on May 8, 2016 at 11:15 pm

    This sucksit said that life was heaven and that was hell
    So that means we’re all going to hell. Great creepypasta though.

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  • Commented on October 27, 2015 at 10:52 pm

    I kind of didn’t get the main idea, but then again I’m not very smart.

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  • Commented on November 15, 2015 at 4:09 pm

    Am I funny yet?

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