The pain ended quickly. I rose and tried to find my body. Probably lying mangled underneath the metallic wreck. Dying in a road accident is definitely the worse way to go.
“So! Had a nice life?” asked a voice behind me.
I turned around to find a woman smiling. Since she could see me I was pretty sure she was a soul like me.
She giggled, “You are taking it pretty well. I am Cindy by the way.”
I spoke evenly,” What happens now? Hell? Heaven?”
She laughed louder.
Before I could say something I heard a commotion from far off.
Cindy shouted,” COME ON!” And she ran.
She turned and yelled,” Have you been good?”
“Have you done any good while you lived?”
Totally confused, I spluttered,” I…I donated blood once.”
As we reached the source of noise I was dumbstruck to find hundreds of people ripping each other apart in front of a hospital.
I shouted, “WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?”
Cindy replied, “Someone is giving birth here. These souls are fighting to get inside the new born shell.”
“But the baby…”
“LISTEN TO ME…THERE IS NO BABY UNTIL A SOUL PENETRATES IT… If no soul makes it inside, the shell is pronounced dead by doctors.”
She continued, “Your fighting strength depends on your Karma. So the soul of a rapist or a paedophile etc. stands no chance. They will never get a shell and will painfully wither away.
Children are most dangerous. Pure souls. Stay away from them during fights.”
“But what about heaven… and hell?”
“THIS IS HELL! And more importantly, the life you left behind… That is heaven.”
60 Comments on 'Afterdeath'
OH Jesus my brain exploded
That was kinda messed up
this is why children scare me, even if i am one myself… they are empty shells spirits possess. i wonder who possessed me… probably someone insane, as i find myself laughing even when nothing is funny… heheh.
you, Sir… have the same Idea as me.
Oh yes, I remember reviewing this ^_^ I passed it with about a 95%. I am glad it got posted and wish you luck :3
wow that was amazing
It was alright 3/5 would have liked it better if it was a longer story.
Amazing pasta! Makes me wonder if stuff like that happens after people die
Interesting theory of reincarnation! I really enjoyed it! Keep writing stories like that! 😉
Good story, I like the concept, I think.if I does I’d be pretty strong as a soul.
WTF?! That’s messed up! Way to put a twist on death…. Now I never want to DIE! Cool story though…..
I kind of didn’t get the main idea, but then again I’m not very smart.
Wow… Just wow. Not really creeped out, but then again after years of reading these, you don’t get scared easily. Very good, puts a nice spin on death 10/10 for sure.
This is amazing
mr skeletal is good
very nice and plez check on my story to im new guys
It’s motivation to be a good person, really.
This concept is really good but what bugs me is that if this were true how would there be so many bad people still coming into the world? She said pedophiles and rapists have literally no chance and just fade away but then that doesn’t explain how there are so many of them that still come into the world. The concept is really good and nice and short though so 4.5/5
this was just a excellent pasta i rate it 5/5
and here is a spider for your excellent story
/╲/\〳 ᴼᴼ ౪ ᴼᴼ 〵/\╱\
Very cool concept, and decent execution. A few minor formatting issues, but the writing itself was pretty good. Keep up the good work.
This is good but very creepy 9/10
Pretty good creepy-pasta. And the karma thing is pretty cool but like someone already said, it kinda ruins it cause if people who have bad karma cant get into the shell then they wither away. but then why does bad stuff still happen? obviously you most likely forget if you are re-incarnated so then you might do something good or bad and that could change within each incarnation assuming your able to get into the baby.
Am I funny yet?
I loved it can there be a part two please c:
great. I love this concept of life and death heaven/Hell. The fact that we all take what we have for granted and that what you’ve done and will do will always come back around to help or damn you!
I never thought about it like that but actually it makes since
OH FAK WHAT Is REAl AND WHAT IS NOT
What is life wat is death
Great job on this 10,000/5
Whoa. Of all the afterlife’s I’ve heard of, this is one of the wildest. I think it comes second only to the theory of one person living every single life in random tandem, one after another.
thats a good one
This is an excellent concept, first off. Unique idea. However, it is far too short for such a great potential story. The formatting has some problems that could have easily been fixed by some extra editing time and attention. It could have used more set-up. If you were to rework this pasta, flesh it out and deepen the experience, I could even see this as a Tales From The Crypt episode.
Completely changed my perspective on life , death, heaven and hell….
Short but good.Not very creepy but interesting
Interesting… What if all souls were just recycled, and eventually they remember who they originally were and the body they posses goes insane. Mind. Blown.
This sucksit said that life was heaven and that was hell
So that means we’re all going to hell. Great creepypasta though.
This was a good pasta with just the right amont of creepy sauce. I just can’t tell if it gave me goosebumps or not because my room is the coldest one in the house. XD
I feel like the message of the story is another “Live life to the fullest” kinda thing. This just has an interesting twist on it.The concept of Heaven and Hell, Heaven being the life you live now, and He’ll being the afterlife, forever trying to get a second chance, is an interesting concept. 11/10 Cupcakes. 🙂
This is actually pretty good, but the whole “soul shell” thing messed up my mind pretty well xD but in the end, it was a great story.
I think that this was a GREAT idea for a story, and I think this would’ve been an AWESOME story if you kind of made it more detailed and longer
Cool and freaky …. And totally out of the ordinary . So of course I loved it!!! Brilliant work and loved the style!!
well it`s better than just disappearing I suppose
Very creative, I have a similar outlook on life.
Existential crisis at its finest
this is a good one i was bamboossled
Wow!! That really fucked my mind!!
Well crap. First of all, I feel bad for the children who are dead. I’m also kinda afraid that if this is what the afterlife is like, I’m pretty much screwed. I’m not a rapist or pedo but I’m kind of bad and haven’t really done anything good yet.
eye opener pasta here
Cool idea, would have liked it to be longer
It was kinda short, but its really good so i guess thats okay.
Really creative! Like really! Great job! I would love a sequel! Like a fight between our character and a child
BEST. CREEPYPASTA. EVER! INFINITE OUT OF TEN
Very interesting angle on the afterlife. Heard, read, seen countless renditions of what happens after we die but this is a new one. Thanks for sharing!
When I die…Do I really just want to climb back inside a baby?
Also gives me a new perspective on babies…
Mother: I had a baby!
Father: No, you had a shell for dead people to climb into… Congragulations
Wait a second, I thought life was Hell
When you die is when you go to Heaven
Life is a LIE!
Good way to put death. Keep up the good work.
Jesus Christ This is dark af
So if you died during childbirth…
…would you be able to give birth to yourself…