Its been eight minutes since I sent my message. Seen, but no reply. Something must have happened. Maybe he’s hurt? It’s not unlikely that he tripped and hit his head. His apartment is a mess after all. Maybe he’s simply ignoring me? No, of course not. He’s not like that.
I grab the keys to my car which I conveniently placed next to my computer, and head out the door. I slice through the night air in my 96′ Corolla and wait impatiently at traffic lights as I rush through the suburbia. Maybe he’s simply not home? Out with his friends? Saw the message, but ignored it? No. Maybe he wants me to want him? Oh, I want him… I flick my blinker and make the corner into his street.
I pull into his driveway and jump out of my car, slamming the door after me in haste. I hurry into the building, a greasy old flat. One would think it has been long since abandoned by the looks of it, but I know better.
I go inside and run up the stairs. What if something really happened to him? No.. I must not think like that. But what if? I need to hurry. I’m panting by the time I reach the fourth floor, but now is not the time to rest. I hastily make my way to the unlocked door of his apartment and go inside. A laptop sits alone on a desk. I place my keys next to the laptop and sit down. Seen but no reply. Maybe he’s hurt.
I grab the keys to my car that lay next to my laptop and head out the door.
46 Comments on 'Seen But No Reply'
It’s… pretty good, but i gotta vote for 3/5
I mean yeah it’s a bit creepy, but what was the point? She/he’s talking to herself/himself?
I was expecting that there was a dead body there and she/he looked at the computer then blah blah blah.
I was expecting a twist, but this is too… meh, boring.
so he was just talking to himself? and it goes like that on and on and on forever? good but… meh wasn’t really scary… Really really well written though nice
This isn’t creepy, and it doesn’t make any sense.
With the way it’s written, there’s no way of knowing whether he just went back to the same place or went to another. Or if there is I haven’t noticed (sorry).
Also there seems to be no conversation going on and neither is there going to be since if that’s how the cycles going to continue then the person will just keep going back to checking for a reply whenever he faces the laptop. I don’t know (dunno, dunno, dunno…)
I think this is a very effective and creepy short story. Though it seems to build up to something back, it shows the simple fact of a delusional, schizophrenic person
It looks to me that he/she has a thought that he/she is messaging herself/himself thinking it’s another person.
is his/her friend even real…that last part confused me
Wew, this is probably a short mindfuck creepypasta.
Little bit creepy.
i don’t really get it?
I think this story would really benefit from a workover.
The initial idea is interesting and I do like the twist (which though is hard to get, that one clue is easily missed), but there is no chance to build any tension with that length.
Anyway I think the concept is promising and would seriously recommend to develop the story further
I thought I was well written, but kind of left everyone wanting more. Like as I read on, I thought it was building up to something shocking, I expected their to be something waiting for him/her. Well written but needs more detail, I look forward to future stories from this author. rate: 3/5
I think he/she’s “forever alone,” he/she made two facebook accounts
I don’t like this if should be longer and more to the point
This confused me for a second, but now I get it :). Really effective and nice work! 🙂 Only negative comment for me is……..You should really let us know what gender the person is. Unless they’re both guys and if so it’s fine 🙂
uuhhhh…..i dont get even a single word of this story…who reviewed this anyways?
That actually fucked with my brain.
So does that mean that she is insaine?
umm im 11 years old and i deffinatally didnt get it i mean i seriously thought there would be a twist like that person was in some type of coma and he/she went to the old apartment that he/she friend lived in………… you know yata yata yata good but keep working on it.
I don’t really get it…but it was interesting to read.
I think the story has a great foundation. I love paradoxes or the illusion of one, but that’s the problem. This needs to be re done to either confirm a paradox, or the fact that the main character is nuts. Either way, add some meat and this pasta would be complete.
For such a short Pasta that was great! I love this pasta so much! 5/5
Great pasta also everybody that is confused it’s called a loop.
Short, but effective. My favorite type of scary stories are like this; not too long and don’t explain too much, but leave the job to the imagination a little bit. Well, written.
The last sentence should say, “After eight minutes, I grab the keys to my car that lay next to my laptop and head out the door.
The last sentence should say, “After eight minutes, I grabed the keys to my car that lay next to my laptop and head out the door.
This was different, I like it. Good work
And your point is..? -_- I see what you were tryna get at and all but really..? That’s how you try to convey it..?
This just goes to show, you don’t need extensive gore or descriptive creatures to make a good story.
I loved it. Got confused at the end but then after looking at it over and over for a minute I got it. Great Pasta!
maybe put stories like this in a separate section … where are the scary ones??
waiting for bae to reply
so there’s just one person in this story as he said he grabbed his keys next to his laptop… i had to reread it alot of times as it confused me!
Nice portrait of insanity. Please do part 2, maybe some backstory. 5/5
Wait if he/she texts him and he didn’t reply and he/she goes to his apartment then the person should find a text he wrote instead of saying ‘seen but no reply’
I reread the ending three times as it confused me in a great way. I love storied that mess with your brain a little. Short but very well written, keep up the good work!
Wow.Really fucked my brain.I laughed hard after realizing what it was. 😀
And at the end you were just annoying af and he dint wanna be freinds whit you..(jk)
I dont get why a lot of people are dissing this pasta, its a little difficult to grasp, but when you do get it, its really powerful, great job man
This is such a great pasta don’t know why people are confused by it 6/10
There is nothing scary or paranormal of this story, but in the slightest degree, it is creepy. I give it a 2 out of 5. No catastrophe or anything happened, just a paranoid person that was concerned for someone.