Tune

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At about the age of ten,
I saw him once but not again.
The man who came from out of town,
The man who wore the blood-soaked crown.

It was the night of Friday eve,
Which from my bed I did not leave.
Out my window I stole a glance,
And saw him there just by chance.

He was tall and thin and made of dark,
His mere presence made dogs bark.
For from his shape he whistled high,
A tune so eerie I can’t deny.

He slinked and stepped along the street,
The sound of sloshing at his feet.
A trail of crimson lay behind,
His next victim he was to find.

He grabbed a blade and on his arm,
He carved a line into a charm.
It was how he kept his body count,
Which looked high from the amount.

A small boy play in a park nearby,
With lots of laughter and a joyful cry.
Then the man turned to him,
A deep grey shadow for a grin.

His face had no features that I could see,
Just deep indents where they would be.
His smile grew wide I must confess,
But nothing prepared me for what was next.

He moved into a jog towards the boy,
Then the child dropped his toy.
He screamed for help but no one came,
He called “Mum! Dad!” and then a name.

A name I had not heard before,
But had seen a few times or maybe more.
It was a name that inspired fear,
But what the hell was he doing here?

He was the stuff of myth, of tales to scare,
With bloodstained clothes and matted hair.
I pressed my face to the glass,
And saw how long the boy did last.

It wasn’t long, in fact was quick,
The boy’s blood was red and thick.
Then the man raised him up high,
The figure then squeezed him dry.

He never stopped his whistled song,
He tapped his foot and swayed along.
As if it were just a show,
His smile did begin to grow.
The blood it ran like a stream,
The cool night air made it steam.
He threw the body to the ground,
It did not move or make a sound.

The boy was dead but he wasn’t done,
The figure laughed as though it were fun.
He pulled a saw and began to cut,
Not the head just everything but.

It wasn’t til he had done his task,
That the man began to laugh.
He threw the bits around the park,
But by this time it was getting dark.

I could not see what happened next,
I just ran over to my desk.
His noise grew loud and from what I could hear,
Was almost whispered in my ear.

It was out of rhythm and made me scared.
And what came next I was not prepared.
On my window I heard a tap,
I looked over and he looked back.

His face was pale as pale could be,
And then he pointed straight at me.
The window opened without a noise,
Blood was dripping, it was the boy’s.

It would seem he wants his tale to be told,
With his skin so pale and his clothes of old.
I sit here writing as he watches,
And on his charm he’s carving notches.

I am aware that he can see
The words I write in front of me.
I hope he decides to show remorse,
Wishful thinking on my part of course.

If you find this and read it through,
I hope he does not come for you.
His legend is his way he moves,
The bloody trail of his shoes.

In stories and songs you’ll find him there,
Please make sure you are prepared.
For if you hear his offbeat tune,
Then he might be after you.

He has his hand upon my shoulder,
The room was warm but now is colder.
I must end this tale of him,
The story of the bloodied king.

At about the age of ten,
I saw him once but not again.
The man who came from out of town,
The man… who wore… the blood-soaked… crown.

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70 Comments on 'Tune'

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 4:55 pm

    That whole time I thought it was going to be a slender man story

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 1:45 pm

    I love how well you can picture it happening. Great detail, 5/5

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  • Commented on November 18, 2015 at 11:30 am

    I can’t thank all of you enough. I honestly didn’t think this would get the amazing support it has. You guys are truly the greatest.

    Thank you again 🙂

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 2:11 am

    Wow…That was Amazing. Great detail. I could picture it vividly. 10/10

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 1:35 pm

    whoa this legit gave me shivers…5/5

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 4:06 pm

    This was really good, genuinely creepy and original.

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 7:31 pm

    very well done, thank you for this

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 1:59 pm

    Unique for a Poem Pasta. I betcha we are gonna start posting fan art.

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 2:58 pm

    I find this one satisfying to my tastes

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  • Commented on November 28, 2015 at 6:14 am

    I am not sure if this is proper etiquette with a CreepyPasta submission BUT, I would once again like to thank everyone for the OVER-WHELMING amount of support on here. I never expected this.
    There have been people doing readings of this on YouTube and there has been some interestingly amazing artwork that has come from this.
    PLEASE keep the artwork coming. It’s all amazing and a sizable chunk of it is now printed and placed upon my wall.

    Again I would like to thank everyone who has helped this become what it is.
    Stay amazing you guys.

    -SpydaBarnes

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    I loved how it’s a poem but it still tells a great story. great pasta 5/5

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  • Commented on November 18, 2015 at 12:44 pm

    Great pasta poem, just wondering though, who is the pasta its about? Is it Slenderman?

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 8:49 pm

    wow i didn’t expect that to end like that 5/5

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  • BloodyHearts
    Commented on November 17, 2015 at 4:16 pm

    On the part where it saidIf you find this and read it through,
    I hope he does not come for you.
    I started hearing whistling it scared the crap out of me 10/10 great pasta

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 8:03 pm

    FUCK dude holy shit. I enjoy these type of creepypastas.

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 2:31 pm

    Wow. Just wow. 5/5 all the way.

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 8:35 pm

    i loved this pasta. best poem pasta i have seen so far. 10/10

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 5:01 pm

    That was amazing.

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 11:00 am

    This is the first creepypoem I’ve actually enjoyed! 5 stars!

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 7:20 pm

    Loved it though. 5/5

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  • Commented on November 19, 2015 at 2:59 pm

    A+

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  • Commented on November 19, 2015 at 3:38 pm

    i thought is was a little confusing at first but it grew on me like the size of the little boys blood puddle

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  • Commented on November 24, 2015 at 3:32 am

    Wow, awesome piece of writing. It was extremely well written and I never got even close to being board or loosing focus on your story. I loved it! It’s the best one I’ve read in a while.

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  • Commented on November 23, 2015 at 6:33 pm

    Truly amazing. Great execution, story, and pace, as well as the rhyme scheme. I liked it alot, on a scale of 1 to 10…I’d give it a 15.

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 2:57 pm

    I loved this. the ryhming sceme made it 100x better

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 7:09 pm

    whoa i thought it was jtk

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  • Commented on November 19, 2015 at 4:55 pm

    I really love the formatting of this creepypasta. I will honestly say that it is one of my favorite creepypastas. I hope to see more of your work!

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  • Commented on November 21, 2015 at 7:37 am

    Wondering who it was about cause I thought Slenderman but then not.. but great story 😀

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  • Commented on November 23, 2015 at 10:04 pm

    Holy crap this was amazing

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  • Commented on November 26, 2015 at 5:46 pm

    I don’t know about you, but if I was the little kid I’d be flailing my arms screaming, “Stranger danger!”

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  • Commented on December 15, 2015 at 11:56 am

    Amazing Story there !
    Made a video out of it and of course left a link to here.
    If someone wants to check it out heres the link:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jo1kwhwhK9c

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  • Commented on January 25, 2017 at 3:06 am

    Quite a creepypasta. Very intriguing. Good job writer.

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  • Commented on November 16, 2015 at 6:09 pm

    Am I the only one who thought it was Jeff the Killer

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 10:31 am

    Love this Creepypasta, it was the best I’ve read for a while. 7/7

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 2:59 pm

    Wonderful

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    10/10 amazing!

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 7:19 pm

    DOES ANYONE KNOW WHO THE HECK THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT ????

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  • Nano
    Commented on November 18, 2015 at 2:31 pm

    Amazing

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  • Nano
    Commented on November 18, 2015 at 2:32 pm

    10/10

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  • Commented on November 18, 2015 at 6:09 pm

    10/10 satisfyingly creepy 🙂

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  • Commented on November 18, 2015 at 9:49 pm

    Dont want to sleep anyway

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  • Commented on November 18, 2015 at 10:39 pm

    thoroughly enjoyed 5/5

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  • Commented on November 19, 2015 at 5:03 pm

    I will say that if you like Jeff the Killer or Slender man, you will really enjoy this.

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  • Commented on November 19, 2015 at 6:51 pm

    The way this is written like a poem really makes it creepier. A truly tasty pasta?

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  • Commented on November 19, 2015 at 11:25 pm

    Great poem i give it a 9/10

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 2:24 pm

    The title is really appropriate.

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 2:47 pm

    Very creepy. Sent shivers down my spine. Great read.

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    this story is very sp00ky i peed my self

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 7:48 pm

    omg that is soooo good! I love the detail!

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  • Commented on November 21, 2015 at 12:36 am

    Hey, not bad. I’m thinking about submitting my own Pasta. Probably won’t be scary tho. XD

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  • Commented on November 21, 2015 at 2:08 am

    This is a great creepy pasta and I love it! Stories like these make my blood run cold.
    I love the cold 10/10

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  • Commented on December 6, 2015 at 5:21 am

    It was pretty good, the poem idea was original but it was a bit tedious to read rhyming words all the way through, but good I rate 10/10

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  • Commented on December 12, 2015 at 11:28 pm

    I truthfully thought the writer was describing slender man but when said bloody crown i thought what?

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  • Commented on December 12, 2015 at 11:28 pm

    OH GOD IM 17!!

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  • IUHoosiersFan
    Commented on February 5, 2016 at 3:57 am

    That was…bland. Unoriginal and a tad trite. It’s poetry, so I can understand how the gimmick carries it to popularity, but the language is so forced and cheesy.

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  • Commented on March 14, 2016 at 5:49 pm

    Why was a kid playing in the park at night? Because plot convenience?

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  • Commented on March 14, 2016 at 11:24 pm

    Have to admit this poem is good. And dark.

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  • SH
    Commented on March 31, 2016 at 12:25 pm

    Was this supposed to be Victor Zsasz? :”D

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  • Commented on July 5, 2016 at 8:58 pm

    5/5. Keep writing. Keep refining your art.

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  • AHABIT
    Commented on June 18, 2017 at 8:30 pm

    I love it! My only critique is that the meter was a little off in some stanzas, but the poem itself was interesting and enjoyable with wonderful imagery!

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  • PancakeWaffleQueen
    Commented on August 27, 2017 at 12:15 am

    Am I the only one who thinks creepy heartless killers like this would be cute anime dudes?

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  • Cassidy
    Commented on October 15, 2017 at 12:32 am

    A lot of the lines seemed forced, messing up the flow of the story. Like certain lines and words are only there so the previous line has something to rhyme with.

    Sometimes it’s better for a poem to not have perfect rhymes.

    I’m negative, I naturally pick up on flaws. Sry

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 1:43 pm

    Who was this about? i was confused

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  • Spooky_jezza
    Commented on June 9, 2016 at 3:55 am

    i reeaaally enjoyed reading this alot more fun than others probably because it was a poem but i need to ask was it slendy?

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  • Commented on November 17, 2015 at 1:51 pm

    Love it.

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 2:20 pm

    really cool, i am personally not afraid cause I’m not 10 :/

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  • Commented on December 4, 2015 at 8:35 pm

    ok im am the bloody swordsman i get it but i don’t go around killing people infact i make myself bleed so i’m stained red of blood

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  • Commented on November 20, 2015 at 6:21 pm

    I really enjoyed this one. Abit Poe-esque and with great rhymes aswell.

    BTW, how do you know if your creepypasta has been rejected? I wrote one which seems to be in the pending-category still. It´s called “The Man in the White Shirt”.

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  • rachna
    Commented on November 17, 2015 at 8:23 pm

    very boring poem…..i dint like it at allllll

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  • Ahmed
    Commented on November 16, 2015 at 11:57 pm

    sex hahahahah

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